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Author Topic: York Peninsular Militia  (Read 7570 times)
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Maj. Arcana
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« on: January 06, 2012, 09:37:06 AM »

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Somewhere along the York Branch of the Shartak Trail...

Here you see Sasaraharla

You whisper to Sasaraharla, “your within the borders of the york peninsula, travelling a road meant for civilized white men only. what do you have to say for yourself native filth?”
The Hierophant looks into the native's eyes and cocks his rifle. "i see my friend global warming knew how to deal with scum like you that wont answer your racial betters." He aims the rifle at the native's head.
The Hierophant fires at you with a rifle for 5 damage. You die.
You say “this is the york peninsula. you want to roam the island searching for animals to sate your lusts, you walk around or you end up dead.”

NOW HEAR THIS: The York Peninsular Militia now assumes total responsibility for the security and well-being of the People of York and her Peninsula. Outsiders are welcome to enlist in the Militia to serve in any capacity except that of the Sheriffs.

York lays claim to its time-honoured right to its own Peninsula. Its boundaries are as far north as the Shartak Passage intersection, as far east as Fort Serious near the Hazen River crossing, and as far west as the Twin Lakes, hereby renamed the Udders of York. Outsider pilgrims are welcome in the peninsula and will be provided for in terms of healing or directions. Natives*, pirates, and half-breeds will be shot on sight. Papists being our step-brothers in christ will be warned to leave our territory and shot if they return.

*Shamans may be excluded from their black brethren if they come to work as exorcists. If they are caught practicing their heathen religion they will be shot first and then hanged.
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Raffles
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« Reply #1 on: January 06, 2012, 01:35:18 PM »

Be aware that New Rafftam and its citizens (i.e the lone Silverback who lives there) are sovereign entities. Any imposition made by the facist forces of York will be met by a sound kicking.

~ A Gorilla, Lord Regent of New Rafftam
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Witch Hazel
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« Reply #2 on: January 06, 2012, 04:39:12 PM »

Somewhere along the York Branch of the Shartak Trail...
*Shamans may be excluded from their black brethren if they come to work as exorcists. If they are caught practicing their heathen religion they will be shot first and then hanged.


WTF...what black brethren. Are you saying all natives are the color black to you?
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The Great Wraith of the NG - Witch Hazel
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Maj. Arcana
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« Reply #3 on: January 06, 2012, 05:18:28 PM »

black as sin. except for half-breeds but there black on the inside. tricksy bastards.
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Witch Hazel
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« Reply #4 on: January 07, 2012, 06:13:33 AM »

I suppose coming from a person that is the color yella through and through...what was I thinking.
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Dani
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« Reply #5 on: January 07, 2012, 06:59:21 AM »

this from the ghost who goes around wailing at people all day long.
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Shroombaker says “Who was it that was looking for Dani al..la-ka-zam?
Witch Hazel
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« Reply #6 on: January 07, 2012, 08:15:48 AM »

this from the ghost who goes around wailing at people all day long.

I suppose since you are now talking for/instead of Maj. Arcana, you didn't get the yella reference. Also, keep up my dear boy, I killed Hexoatl with a wooden club earlier and 'poof' he was a spirit.  Kiss

You attack Hexoatl with a wooden club for 3 damage. They die.
You chant and focus the negative energies at the spirits. You gain 3 XP.
You hear Hexoatl let out a banshee wail coming from all around you.
« Last Edit: January 07, 2012, 08:20:37 AM by Witch Hazel » Logged

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Billfred
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« Reply #7 on: January 08, 2012, 08:18:42 PM »

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A tall man in a yellow and black checkered coat swans into the room. It is the Herald of York, he pulls a scroll from his belt and reads aloud:
"Officer Food of the Most Holy and Sovereign Order of Patriots, defender of York, Minister for Interior Affairs for York and its outlying territories, colonies, domains, protectorates, provinces and outposts, current Chair of the GSUC and the DCoY etc etc etc announces that this clan is under probation, for 2 weeks from hence.
Also, the Boundaries that the Militia declare are found to be against the York Constitution as set down by the York Federation under the Boundaries of York section. In other words - your boundary exceeds the limit that the York Federation agreed upon 2 years ago, please revise them"
Signed: G Food
The Herald begins to read the titles written down but quickly trails off. With a swish of his cloak, The Herald bows and leaves the room

ooc: I have so many titles, I keep forgetting which ones are relevant!
« Last Edit: January 08, 2012, 08:23:22 PM by Billfred » Logged

Billfred - Elephant Hunter - active
Bluebeards Leg - Trader - inactive
Getsome Food - York Patriot - inactive
Hexoatl - Healer and Exorcist - inactive
pirate eater - PK'er - active

Billfred (me) - troll, bad flamer, and tired.
Maj. Arcana
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« Reply #8 on: January 08, 2012, 08:45:42 PM »

I know the feeling!


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Outside, hung by his intestines to the deserted Noticeboards, is the bullet-riddled remains of a tall man in a yellow and black checkered coat. It is the Herald of York. The coat has been turned inside out and put back on the corpse. A note has been squashed into the coat's flask pocket.
"the YPM is not bound by constitutions written and signed by the papist dandies of York's recent past. the peninsula belongs to us. all of it."
Signed: The Hierophant, Sheriff of York, Commander of the People's Peninsular Militia
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Billfred
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« Reply #9 on: January 10, 2012, 11:53:56 PM »

On his daily routine of the town Getsome notices the strung up body of the Herald. With disgust he looks over toward the Hierophants hut. "Beware Hierophant" he whispers under his breath, "beware".

Meanwhile on the outskirts of York

Quote
(2012-01-10 23:48) You attack Bud the Chud with a machete for 1 damage. You gain 1 XP. They die. You gain 45 XP.
(2012-01-10 23:48) Underworld log successful .
(2012-01-10 23:48) You say “Attack my citizens. Feel my wrath!”

Back in York

Getsome walks into the Hierophant's hut, today he is not smiling. "You killed my herald you monster!"
He places the bloodied scroll onto the desk and walks out. Shouting back "Consider your options Militia, consider them wisely"
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Billfred - Elephant Hunter - active
Bluebeards Leg - Trader - inactive
Getsome Food - York Patriot - inactive
Hexoatl - Healer and Exorcist - inactive
pirate eater - PK'er - active

Billfred (me) - troll, bad flamer, and tired.
Maj. Arcana
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« Reply #10 on: January 13, 2012, 09:58:03 AM »

good to see you killed that cannibal. i guess your not completely useless after all.

we're a simple people, we Yorkmen. give us some pumpkin mash, a rat on a string, and a fresh girlie every night of the week, and we're good. we dont need heralds dressed in livery and official scrolls and crap like that. if you want that i suggest you go back to rome.

speaking of worthless foreigners, i got killed today by my old pal B-tch Hazel. nothing new there, she still doesnt have the guts to come in person and take a womanly beating. but there were a bunch of other spirits along with her, and the funny thing is they were mostly Yorkmen. they were calling themselves 'lezbian haters' or something, and with a name like that it seems to me we ought to be allies. just dump the old squaw, put your birthday suits back on, and come join me for a beer and a chitchat. open invitation.
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Witch Hazel
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« Reply #11 on: January 13, 2012, 06:10:23 PM »

speaking of worthless foreigners, i got killed today by my old pal B-tch Hazel.

Really? You go around gloating about your kills here and yet you call me a b-tch when I kill you. Don't you think you're being a bit petty and rude?

...but there were a bunch of other spirits along with her, and the funny thing is they were mostly Yorkmen.

This is the first I have heard of all these spirits you claim I have brought with me. Who are they since I have not a clue who you are talking about.
« Last Edit: January 13, 2012, 06:14:13 PM by Witch Hazel » Logged

The Great Wraith of the NG - Witch Hazel
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« Reply #12 on: January 13, 2012, 06:32:49 PM »

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Don't you think you're being a bit petty and rude?

kinda slow on the uptake, amirite?

Quote
This is the first I have heard of all these spirits you claim I have brought with me. Who are they since I have not a clue who you are talking about.

that's between me and the lezbian haters.
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Witch Hazel
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« Reply #13 on: January 14, 2012, 06:23:41 PM »

Since many don't understand what you say or write most the time, a couple of us thought we would help you. I am now off to mess with someone else.

The Hierophant says “OH GOD WHY DID I WASTE MY LIFE?” with a slight accent.
The Hierophant says “I DON'T KNOW, I LIVE TO HURT MYSELF!” with a slight accent.
You force The Hierophant to speak.
The Hierophant says “WHY DOES EVERYONE HATE ME?” with a slight accent.
The Hierophant says “IS IT BECAUSE I'M SO UNLIKABLE?” with a slight accent.
The Hierophant says “WHY CAN'T I SPELL 'LESBIAN' CORRECTLY?” with a slight accent.
The Hierophant says “ B.E.C.A.U.S.E...I.M...A...F.A.I.L.U.R.E...E.V.E.N...A.S...A...H.O.M.O.P.H.O.B.E” with a slight accent.
You force The Hierophant to speak.

The Hierophant scratches out what was carved on the side of a hut.
The Hierophant carves something onto the side of a hut.

Please come inside and murder me! Free XP for everyone! -Hierophant”.
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The Great Wraith of the NG - Witch Hazel
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Maj. Arcana
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« Reply #14 on: January 14, 2012, 07:41:25 PM »

your the only one who has this constant problem understanding me. also i think your the only one who was possessing me there, not 'a couple of us' as you claim. i dont know this 'homophobe' you keep rattling about, man/woman seksing is the default state of nature, all else is corruption. says so in the scriptures. but dont get your goat-skin knickers in a twist, i'll just say 'woman sodomite' instead ok? seems strange you'd suddenly become a strong speller though when up to now you couldnt even spell my name right.

now if you'll excuse me i have to get the taste of old squaw out of my mouth and then go back to the training of heroes.

* * *

The YPM is still looking for a permanent sgt of Pastors and a sgt of Quartermasters, as well as regular militia men for all positions. if your interested come see The Hierophant for a beer and a chitchat.
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