Pirates Raid in Dalpok

[Dani]

A sign has just appeared on the noticeboard in Dalpok:

The Bloody Legion of Black-Hearted Brigands lay claim to Dalpok

Natives: Your time of suffering at the hands of cannibals and each other is at an end. Now you're going to suffer MUCH MORE at the hands of the Pirates your ancestors have attacked for so long.

If you want to avoid unending torture, you must kill the Native known as ClickClick. For every day that ClickClick lives, another native will die.

Gorry Louie,
Interrogator
Black Hearted Brigands

Who's with me, mateys? Let's terrorize the Natty and back up my otherwise unlikely to succeed boast! YARRR!

[pet142]

That sounds like a grand plan! I be on me way mate.
                                                                        - Jack Kidd

[Raven Black]

I can be on my way as soon as I know our 2 leaders say they are behind this.

[Dani]

I can be on my way as soon as I know our 2 leaders say they are behind this.

Damned if I know. It be Gor's plan. No permission slip required, matey.

[Raan'dul]

Your 'people', if that is what you call yourselves, have raided and pillaged our village for as long as you have been on our island. Stories passed down from our ancestors tell of peaceful intentions when greeting the pirates who first arrived on the island. Our ancestors were also greeted with steel and death. So if you follow through with your attack upon our village, you shall meet your ancestors.

Raan'dul

[Dani]

Your 'people', if that is what you call yourselves, have raided and pillaged our village for as long as you have been on our island. Stories passed down from our ancestors tell of peaceful intentions when greeting the pirates who first arrived on the island. Our ancestors were also greeted with steel and death. So if you follow through with your attack upon our village, you shall meet your ancestors.

Raan'dul

So, some pipsqueak be speakin' fore Dalpok after all. Well, who be the mighty natty...oh, it be the chile I kilt a few hours afar. How be the dirt nap, natty? Best be gittin' used ter 'em.

Oh, an' Natty--Cain't speak fore me mateys, but fore my party tharr t'aint be no such t'ing as yon blinkin' ancestors. They be wot yer call a 'miff'.

[Zhao Shi Li]

Although I have no qualms with killing those of Dalpok, I wonder at your authority to call such a raid into being. I will surely be doing, as I have always planned, killing natives of Dalpok that threaten the shipwreck. Should the captain I swear loyalty to say to come and join a full force in the village, I will rise in an instant. Should a shipmate need help because of the actions of a native, I will come to their aid.

Those that seek to impose their will on others without first allegiance gaining, shall push the sails of the ship into the red sunrise. Through unity and not mutiny shall the sea dwellers make their power known.

[KingBiscuit]

Killing Dalpokis is considered the national past-time of all pirates. The life of a pirate should be considered as one massively excessive unending raid of Dalpok until such time as all of Dalpok collapses into the singularity of a black hole created by an ever densifying pirate population.

As such, as Captain of the Marines and Sergeant at Arms of the Hellborn Strumpet and co-leader of the Bloody Legion I do declare that no raid against Dalpok need be declared as it is assumed all pirates are already raiding Dalpok at this precise moment in time. Similarly, no such raid can ever be called off as the very nature of pirates is ipso facto to raid Dalpok and thus as long as a single pirate draws breath, Dalpok shall be in the process of being raided. This is the only concrete fact that exists under quantum mechanics and is the basis upon which our reality currently operates.

The aforementioned monologue is said to have been delivered by Opium Joe (as reported by his prized parrot, Also Opium Joe) while the noted pirate was shouting at a banana tree alone in the jungle.

[Killian]

OOC: The speech makes some weird leaps. Are you RPing Opium Joe to be a bit out of his gourd?

[Dani]

Killing Dalpokis is considered the national past-time of all pirates. The life of a pirate should be considered as one massively excessive unending raid of Dalpok until such time as all of Dalpok collapses into the singularity of a black hole created by an ever densifying pirate population.

As such, as Captain of the Marines and Sergeant at Arms of the Hellborn Strumpet and co-leader of the Bloody Legion I do declare that no raid against Dalpok need be declared as it is assumed all pirates are already raiding Dalpok at this precise moment in time. Similarly, no such raid can ever be called off as the very nature of pirates is ipso facto to raid Dalpok and thus as long as a single pirate draws breath, Dalpok shall be in the process of being raided. This is the only concrete fact that exists under quantum mechanics and is the basis upon which our reality currently operates.

The aforementioned monologue is said to have been delivered by Opium Joe (as reported by his prized parrot, Also Opium Joe) while the noted pirate was shouting at a banana tree alone in the jungle.

Gorry Louie stares blankly into space for several seconds following this pronouncement. Then he shakes off his stupefaction, grabs his cap off his head, and roars:

Well, yer heard the trainin' wheels cap'n, let all yon mateys head ter Dalpok an' we'll tickle the natty with our cutlasses and dance 'em to the end o' the plank. YARRR!