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Author Topic: Cannibal Contest: The Bludgeon of Mal  (Read 31619 times)
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Neil Tathers
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« on: December 28, 2010, 04:59:27 PM »

Dreams

Grunk the Pale bowed low before the Fat Red Saint.  Receiving the gift of a crab, and thanking the Fat Red Saint for his generosity, Grunk ate the crab.  The meat tasted weird in his mouth, slightly metallic, and his eyes shuddered in his skull.  Mist enveloped him.

The mist obscured his vision, and Grunk began to walk within it aimlessly.  Sounds of battle could be heard faint and low beyond the mist.  Grunk ran eagerly forward into it, searching for the source.  As the noise grew louder Grunk's instincts told him to jump backward, and he followed them.

A giant black mace slammed into the ground in front of him.  A strong warrior stepped forward through the mist, his belt decorated with skulls, severed fingers were strung across his neck, and bulging muscles flexed as they lifted the giant mace once more.

"YOU CALL YOURSELF A WARRIOR!" shouted the giant cannibal, striking where Grunk laid in shock.  The young cannibal manage to roll, the impact of the mace shaking the ground.  "YOU FLEE FROM BATTLE!"

The mist began to clear and slowly Grunk could see more of his surroundings.  People were dead all around them, cannibal and human alike.  Others were still fighting, a circle around several shaman, who were chanting in tongues.

"THIS IS THE FINAL BATTLE.  THIS IS WHERE THE CANNIBALS TRIED TO STOP THEIR EXILE.  THIS IS WHAT YOU MUST AVOID." said the giant cannibal.  "MY WEAPON WILL HELP THAT."

Grunk stared in awe at the battle before him.  The ocean was running red with blood, the sand stained a reddish brown color, dead bodies floating everywhere.  "Where is your weapon oh lord?"

"LORD MALROGK'S BLUDGEON IS LOCATED AT A PYRAMID.  IN A LAND OF THAT IS TORMENTED."

"I know of a such a place."

"BE WARY. THOSE THAT GUARD IT ARE STRONG.  THEY KNOW NOT WHAT THEY HAVE FOUND."

The mist enveloped Grunk again, the ground beneath his feet went fro soil to wooden floorboards.  Grunk stood up, blinking a few times.  The Fat Red Saint was gone, in fact the hut was dark.  Grunk looked around and saw the old tiger that followed him standing guard near the door.  

"Tiger, we are going to Dalpok."

It roared in response.


Official Contest Rules
Rules may be subject to change at the whim of the coordinator of the contest

Points for Killing People.
(Underworld Log is necessary for kill.  Kills only count for victims Level 3 and above.)

   * +1 for Initial Kill
   * +3 for Dalpok Villager or a pirate(Those that are from Dalpok or the shipwreck)
   * +7 for Serial Killer (+500 Player Kills)
   * +5 for Slaughterer (100-499 Player Kills)
   * +3 for Butcher (50-99 Player Kills)
   * +2 for Killer (20-49 Player Kills)
   * +1 for Aspiring killer (1-19 Player Kills)
   * -5 for Peaceful (0 Player Kills Bonus points null on these targets.)
   * -5 for Cannibal (Bonus points null on these targets.)
  
Bonus points
Screen Shots needed for Bonus points to be effective.  All Screen Shots should be posted in this thread or sent to me via PM if you want to be Anonymous.
   * +3 for First Feast on victim
   * +1 for Additional Feasts on victim
   * +1 for Healing a Fellow Cannibal that is participating in the contest (For Every Healing Herb used, Screen shot required)
   * +1 for Taunting (If I deem a Taunt unworthy, I will not include it in the total points.  You have been warned.)
   * +10 for Fresh Kill

The contest begins on January 18th (midnight server time).   Before that time you should stock up on herbs and clubs and get yourselves to the vicinity of Dalpok.  All contestants should either post their cannibal profile here, or send me the profile over PM if they want to be anonymous.  The contest ends when someone reaches a total of 300 points or has the most points at the end of February 25th (midnight server time).

Contestants.
Bobby the Hatchet - +150
Grunk the Pale - +158
Edward Theodore Gein - +309
Kali'na - +258
Tkltchk - +168
Huli Bluebeard - +118
Exterminater894 - +42
snico - +11
« Last Edit: February 15, 2011, 02:38:01 AM by Neil Tathers » Logged

Bobby the Hatchet
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« Reply #1 on: December 28, 2010, 07:06:46 PM »

Bobby the Hatchet crawls forth from hibernation, placing an ear to the ground. The thunderous sounds of battle and the whispers of ancient warrior spirits can be heard.

"I too know of such a place. A brief slumber and then to Dalpok! To glorious death among warriors!"
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"He is really not so ugly after all, provided, of course, that one shuts one's eyes, and does not look at him." - Oscar Wilde
Dani
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« Reply #2 on: December 28, 2010, 09:02:58 PM »

A parrot flies in with a note tied to its legs. Written on the blank side of an anarchist political pamphlet is a message addressed to Grunk the Pale:

Just heard the news. This must be what you meant at Grottoram.

In Dalpok now with another cannibal, 800 Pound Gorilla. Have other reason to be there, of course (see pamphlet) but am open to doing some research on the weapon while in the area.

Where is this pyramid supposed to be? Gps coords preferred. Feed and send parrot back with reply.

In Solidarity,

Mencken
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Neil Tathers
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« Reply #3 on: December 29, 2010, 02:59:46 PM »

OOC:First post modified with rules of contest.

IC:

The parrot flies back, hastily scratched in the blood of what is presumed to be another human is Grunk's response.

"I believe it is where the Queen lives. We will wrestle it out of their dead hands."
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Iceman
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« Reply #4 on: December 29, 2010, 08:09:28 PM »

Tkltchk is in.
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Twist - boner-inducingly handsome | ClickClick - guardian of the Dalpoki | Sympathetic Phil - hard-bitten mercenary and surly drunkard |
Tkltchk - hungry, want eat | Fist McRhinopuncher - fairly self-explanatory

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Katie Calhoun
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« Reply #5 on: December 29, 2010, 11:25:23 PM »

Kali'na's in
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Blaktoof says “You permit yourselves to be lead at the nose by some toothless juggalo teen-grandma whose hobby is running an imagniary bar.     
A parrot squawks "I know where the heavy sword is. Follow me!" (2011-01-22 19:54)
A parrot squawks "Katie has a big fat butt" (2012-02-10 17:06)
Dani
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« Reply #6 on: December 30, 2010, 08:51:07 AM »

What about the Queen of Dalpok? Being Raktami, is she a legitimate target? If so, are there bonus points for killing her?
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Neil Tathers
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« Reply #7 on: December 30, 2010, 11:43:47 AM »

http://www.shartak.com/profile.cgi?id=6639

She's Dalpoki now.

Also I wouldn't want to Grief someone.
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Dani
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« Reply #8 on: December 30, 2010, 12:34:11 PM »

No, of course not. But it seems to me that if anyone knows where this mace is, she will, and if there is anyone in Dalpok who would try to prevent us from laying hands on it, it will be she, who was not even alive when we first reclaimed our ancestral right to the mainland. So I would suggest that bonus points be given for her death.
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Neil Tathers
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« Reply #9 on: December 30, 2010, 01:28:39 PM »

Already clamoring for bonus points?  I like your style.

We shall see how the contest unfolds.  As with previous contests, expect rules to morph throughout it.
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Iceman
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« Reply #10 on: December 30, 2010, 03:57:41 PM »

Dalpok has no queen.
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Twist - boner-inducingly handsome | ClickClick - guardian of the Dalpoki | Sympathetic Phil - hard-bitten mercenary and surly drunkard |
Tkltchk - hungry, want eat | Fist McRhinopuncher - fairly self-explanatory

"Iceman?" How gay is that? | Suggestions
Solemn
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« Reply #11 on: December 30, 2010, 06:20:14 PM »

Dalpok has no queen.

Or toilet paper.
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Valerie Solanas
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« Reply #12 on: January 01, 2011, 09:39:22 AM »

Dalpok has no queen.

No?
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"Just as humans have a prior right to existence over dogs by virtue of being more highly evolved and having a superior consciousness, so women have a prior right to existence over men. The elimination of any male is, therefore, a righteous and good act, an act highly beneficial to women as well as an act of mercy."

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« Reply #13 on: January 01, 2011, 06:43:08 PM »

snico is in... but her attention span is short so a month long contest might give you all a heads up on her.
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Snico Princess Nico Marcy
A parrot squawks "Lady be free, Lady be fine! Princess Nico, Will you be mine?" (2010-08-30)
Bobby the Hatchet
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« Reply #14 on: January 01, 2011, 11:40:23 PM »

If a cannibal killed is also a Slaughterer or above, do the -5 and +5 zero each other out with possible reduced points for the higher tiers? I'm not trying to be a total bastard, but if I happen upon any of you that are bleeding out in the field, I'm definitely going to consider doing the math on that .
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"He is really not so ugly after all, provided, of course, that one shuts one's eyes, and does not look at him." - Oscar Wilde
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