THE HANGED MISFIT BAR

[Katie Calhoun]

Since so much happens at the Misfit I thought I would share. I will always post a few days after it happened in case anyone in the bar at that time can be gone if they don't want their where abouts known. I guess I could start when Wild Bill decided not to keep killing everyone and we stopped killing him plus when Cube with Legs showed up at the bar.

2010-10-10

 cube with legs crawls out of the corner upon hearing the first chords on piano. It seems to be captivated by the musical notes and swiftly runs towards piano.
cube with legs jumps atop of the nearby table and leans forward at the very edge of the wooden surface. It almost falls down a couple of times while observing the small concert of EVA and Erich.
 cube with legs nervously widdles its legs every time the table is about to fall over somehow maintaining the balance but apparently being annoyed at the little noises and scratches such movements are making.
 cube with legs slowly reaches one leg towards the piano keyboard when Cold Seether rushes in and unloads the rifle on a bar patron.

Cold Seether kills Wild Bill Hickok with a rifle.
Cold Seether says “I'm not even active and you still couldn't manage to kill me! That's just sad”

Paddy MacManus laughs at Cold Seether, "I think he was trying to negotiate a peace treaty. I don't want to see a place in Derby named Wild Bill's"

Katie Calhoun say “Yes...he said he would not kill any more of us so please don't kill Wild Bill anymore. Paddy..anyone can take a hut and call it anything the want. You can do it too it you want.”

 cube with legs makes a turn in the middle air and bumps on the floor. It crawls towards Seether and brushes a metal leg against the rifle. After a few moments of careful observation, it moves towards dead body.
cube with legs extends the frontal legs and starts fiddling around with the corpse. One of them makes a silent click and is immersed in the warm pool of blood gathering on the floor. The cube slurps a bit of it.
 cube with legs flinches and jumps back as the spirit leaves the dead man on the floor and the body dissolves.

Wild Bill Hickok says “So do we have an agreement?”
 Wild Bill Hickok says “I might add that I am happy to wipe the slate clean and get on with ma business in town”
 Wild Bill Hickok says “But I expect no further incidents from your patrons and the federation”
 Wild Bill Hickok says “yall might not like me but in time yall learn imma fair man...a quiet man”

 cube with legs slowly crawls near Wild Bill and pokes it once with a steel tentacle. Suddenly it creeks and the tip turns into a small knife.
 cube with legs slices the leg of Wild Bill with a swift move and licks some more blood with another leg. Seemingly satisfied, it turns the knife ending back to the default and crawls away.

 Wild Bill Hickok says “Cube yall eva see a moving picture called Wild Wild West? ”

 cube with legs makes a round trip in the bar, stopping by each patron and poking their skin. It seems to be either oblivious or ignoring Wild Bill.
 cube with legs  finishes poking each member and then returns to EVA. The cube stands still for a few minutes. One leg bumping into the wooden floor. Then turns around and crawls out through a closest window.
 cube with legs crawls back through another window, carrying a used rifle with it. It looks around, then puts the gun on a table and moves the barrel towards Wild Bild.
 cube with legs pushes the trigger awkwardly for several times but nothing happens. The gun seems to be not loaded.
 cube with legs then picks the rifle again and crawls to Cold Seether. It puts the gun down on the ground and touches the one Seether owns. It even tries to pry it from the hands of the gunslinger to no avail.
 cube with legs takes a careful look at its own gun, then back at Seether's. It waits.

 Wild Bill Hickok says “Tha film didnt end to well for the mechanical spider...just thought idda let yall know”

 Fester Shinetop says “Yeah - I heard that the mechanical spider in Wild Wild West never worked in Hollywood again after that film.”

 Erich Zann puts viol away, and notices that the cube is moving and acting on it's own accord. "uh, I thought it was a coffee table of some sort when I first walked in here."

Katie Calhoun watches the Cube "We do have a agreement Wild Bill. There was just a couple we could not get a hold of to tell them about it and Cold was one."”
 Katie Calhoun pulls a machete out from behind the counter "I am not sure a rifle is for you Cube but a machete might be. You can have this one as long as you behave in the bar and not kill anyone."
Katie Calhoun give a machete to cube with legs .
Katie Calhoun “We tend to go and kill anyone who kills in the bar even though the death of Wild Bill is a long story and should not happen again.”
 Katie Calhoun starts wiping down the tables with a damp cloth and notices one has little tiny 'feet' prints.
 Katie Calhoun continues on to the rest of the tables "If you're going to walk on the tables Cube just make sure your feet are clean."

 cube with legs picks the machete and examines it carefully, especially the sharp steel edge. The cube puts the weapon down and extend one leg above it.
 cube with legs stares at it with the front wall and the limb starts to creek changing its shape. After a few attempts it folds into an almost exact shape of the blade.
 cube with legs turns to a nearby chair and chops it in half with one swing. Then makes a fit hits on the corner of the bar sprinkling sawdust around.
 cube with legs folds the blade back into a leg and drags both the machete and the rifle towards Katie. It returns the blade and goes back to stare at Seether's weapon.
 cube with legs gives Katie Calhoun a machete.

 E.V.A. stands from the piano and makes her way towards the cube. She pats it on the head, a metal ring resounding through the bar. She heads out of the bar for a few moments.

 Katie Calhoun takes the machete back from Cube and looks around at all the mess Cube has made.
 Katie Calhoun grabs the broom and shows Cube "This is a broom so if you can shape one of your legs into it I suggest you start cleaning up your mess."

 E.V.A. walks into the bar and clicks her way over to the cube. She gives a wooden smile and holds up another small cube.
 E.V.A. shakes a dice cup and spills them onto the floor. They show a four and a one.

 Katie Calhoun places the broom against the wall. "If not then use this broom." Katie looks down at Cube
Katie Calhoun says “Good idea EVA

 E.V.A. seats herself next to the metal destructor and occupies herself with playing dice while humming an electronic sounding melody.
 E.V.A. shakes a dice cup and spills them onto the floor. They show a one and a two.

 Wild Bill Hickok says “night all imma find me a spare hut”

[Katie Calhoun]

 Erich Zann says “Well as interesting and lively as this place has been recently, I have business to conduct elsewhere. Ladies, Gentlemen, Automotrons, I bid you all adieu.”

 cube with legs makes a tiny jump when patted on the upper wall. It takes a few frantic steps back and stares at EVA. One leg rises above the cube and touches the upper plane of the host.
 cube with legs seems to be rather intense while touching itself but soon the nervous ticks in stiff limbs pass away. It puts the leg down and tries to peek where EVA went through the gap in the door.
 cube with legs turns to Katie when offered the broom. It takes the thing and quickly puts it on the floor, next to the rifle. The two legs engage and thorough touching and measuring, as if comparing the two.
 cube with legs seems to quickly lose the interest and kicks the broom away. It turns to the tiny things EVA just brought back. Cube embraces one of them and rolls it around observing different patterns.
 cube with legs then pokes at another dice and watches it roll in the similar manner. It lifts itself back to take a look at EVA and then turns to Seether again. One leg points at the rifle.

 Herckelberk says “o_o”
 Herckelberk says “Some really weird goin' on around here lately.”

 Katie Calhoun looks at the broken chair and the broom thrown across the room "You think?"

 Herckelberk says “...and by "weird" I mean "awesome."”

 Katie Calhoun walks over and picks up the broom and hands it to Herckelberk "Pretty awesome mess Cube can make when he gets into it"
 Katie Calhoun looks at the chopped places on the counter and wonders how she's going to fix that.

 Herckelberk sweeps up a bit.
 Herckelberk says “:B”

 Katie Calhoun laughs at Herckelberk as she takes the broom back and goes into the back room to get some well deserved rest.

Fester Shinetop says “Maybe someone should explain to that cube that people are rather averse to being shot and killed, before curiosity about Mr Seether's demonstration of one gets it into trouble..”
 Fester Shinetop says “It seems like a pretty curious thing, but we all know where curiosity got the cat.”
 Fester Shinetop says “On Uther's KOS list.”

 Deus257 says “I'm back, what happened while I was away?”

 Katie Calhoun says “Wild Bill called for a truce so we can't kill him anymore unless he gets stupid again. Also there is this little cube with legs that walked in from the jungles. I don't think he's from Earth.”

 Uther says “Good to be back on dry land. Fester Shinetop you mad genius! Your treasure hunt was maddening! You deserve a beer! Here ya go.”
 Uther says “Cheers!”
 Uther says “a cube with legs? What a strange creature! But it has taken residence in our great town, so have a beer, as a welcoming gift.”

Katie Calhoun hands Cube a bottle of water "I wonder if Cube would rather have a bottle of water. That is what EVA drinks."
 Katie Calhoun give a bottle of fresh water to cube with legs .
 Katie Calhoun watches Cube to see what it does with the bottle of water.

 Fester Shinetop says “Thank you Uther - Cheers!”

 E.V.A. pats the cube again. She rolls the dice and leaves them on the floor next to it.
 E.V.A. shakes a dice cup and spills them onto the floor. They show a four and a five.
 E.V.A. stands and clicks her way over to the piano. She plays a few keys to test, and then bursts out a loud blues song.
 E.V.A. finishes her first song of the day and gives a slight bow to those in the room. She then turns her attention to the cube on the floor. She becons him over to her.
 E.V.A. begins to play chopsticks, showing the little cube a few of the notes and waiting for him to catch on.

 Katie Calhoun grins at EVA "I hope he doesn't think you want him to chop the piano into sticks."
  Katie Calhoun hear Deus257 whisper “Aw, isn't that cute, I think EVA found someone that can help her feel more human.”

[Katie Calhoun]

2010-10-11

 cube with legs seems to ignore the dice on the floor while receiving so many things in short time. It receives both bottles with a firm steel grip. Cube turns from Uther to Katie, then back, then once again...
 cube with legs pats a few legs to the floor frantically. Finally the top wall slides a bit to the side making a silent buzzing sound. A rather spacious internal storage reveals itself and cube leans forward.
 cube with legs it shakes itself with a great force and a pile of stuff falls to the ground. Stones, dried leaves, some coins, an old shoe, some FAKs, dirty shells from the beach, rotten coconut, a wrench...
 cube with legs pokes at various items on the ground nervouslly bumping its legs all around. Finally it just kicks forwards a pair and stashes the rest back to its internal trunk.
 cube with legs drags its old rifle behind with the rear leg while giving Uther a GPS and a gold coin to Katie.
 cube with legs gives Katie Calhoun 1 gold coin.
 cube with legs seems to be rather curious about the rifle Uther is carrying with him. It takes a pause to observe the weapon before moving on. After delivering the items, the cube picks the bottle of beer.
 cube with legs compares it to the others in the bar and puts it inside. The water bottle is smashed to the floor making another colossal mess. Cube uses a leg to slurp almost all of it and waits for a while.

 Katie Calhoun jerks her head around at the noise and figures Cube didn't know how to open the bottle.

 cube with legs turns around several times, jumps up and down the bar, makes a neat salto on the way down as if testing its agility. After a series of exercises, it proceeds to EVA dragging its rifle behind.

 Katie Calhoun looks around and finds what she is looking for and walks over to Cube and squats down and shows Cube the bottle opener in her hand.
Katie Calhoun says “This is what opens a bottle and I bet you can forum one of your little legs into one.”
 Katie Calhoun stands back up and goes get the mop to clean up the floor with.
 Katie Calhoun places the bottle opener in her pocket and starts mopping

 cube with legs shapes one leg into the shape of a bottle opener and stares it at for a while. It tries hitting a chair nearby with the new tool to no effect. Then looks around and notices bar patrons use it.
 cube with legs pulls out its newly acquired beer and does the same. Unfortunately, the lid doesn't fit back any more so it picks a piece of dirty cloth from the floor and stuffs the bottle with it.
 cube with legs puts the thing away in the same portable compartment and carefully observes Katie cleaning the floor. The cube seems to hesitate whether to stay with EVA or not but eventually rushes to the bar.

 cube with legs still drags the rifle behind. It picks two bottles with the middle limbs, finds a clear spot in the bar and smashes both to the floor. Then pries some of the things Katie just used from her hands.
 cube with legs cleans one spot nicely and stands for a bit as if comparing the two results. It makes some clicking and buzzing sounds inside, then returns Katie her things and crawls back to piano.
 cube with legs is about to leave the smashed bottle behind but stops in the midway and turns back. It carefully eyes the bar with all 3 walls. Then hesitantly returns back and cleans up the rest of the mess.
 cube with legs finally crawls back to the piano noisily dragging the same gun through the wooden floor. It pulls a small chair and jumps on it.
 cube with legs tries all the piano keys from left to right and back. Then turns to EVA. Something buzzes, beeps and turns inside, several legs start to twitch.
 cube with legs cracks inside a few times and a hollow genderless voice rises within "q'... q, Q~ cuuuuuu be. Cuuube."

 E.V.A. turns her head with a click and smiles woodenly at the cube sitting next to her. "EVA. A pleasure Cube."
 E.V.A. goes back to playing, glancing over at the cube now and then to see if he is paying attention. She plays the simple part and points at Cube, she then plays the second part. "You will assist me?"

Deus257 takes a seat and looks at the cube with legs with an amused look on his face

[Katie Calhoun]

The next day

Katie Calhoun takes the small bag of coins "Looks like Fester is buying a round!"
Katie Calhoun picks up a tray and starts filling it with bottles of beer.
Katie Calhoun sits one beer in front of everyone including Cube.
Katie Calhoun takes the empty tray back to the bar and sits it down and then starts restocking the shelf.
Katie Calhoun finishes restocking the shelf and sits the empty box in the corner "We will miss you Fester and hope you come back and visit anytime. Sounds like Cube will be talking pretty well by then"
Katie Calhoun whisper to Fester Shinetop , “Thanks Fester and stay safe. I tried to give you a beer but your pack is too full.”

Fester Shinetop says “Okay - I'm stocked up on FAKs, and now I'm off. Goodbye everyone!”

Wild Bill Hickok says “Mam ill have 2 beers”

cube with legs stares at EVA pushing white piano keys and tries copying that quite successfully. It follows in the footsteps of notes missing just one or two. The duet results in a bit of cacophony.
cube with legs repeats the same piece a few times, missing fewer and fewer notes each time until it sounds perfect. Then faces Katie and takes the beer with some reluctancy.
cube with legs puts the bottle in the drawer and gives the barmaid a sharpening stone in return.
cube with legs crawls to Uther and places two gold coins in front of him. Then points to the rifle.

Katie Calhoun comes walking out from the back room after hearing Wild Bill. "Two beers coming up Wild Bill"
Katie Calhoun grabs 2 bottles of beer and sits them down on the table in front of Wild Bill "Let me know if I can get you anything else"
Katie Calhoun then looks over at Cube "Thanks for the sharpening stone Cube. If you can let me know if there is anything you want. Not sure you even drink or eat anything."
Katie Calhoun grins at Cube "But if you do eat fruit I can go pick some."
Katie Calhoun starts feeling sleepy and heads to her sleeping quarters "Night everyone. See you in the morning. EVA...activate security"
Katie Calhoun hears Wild Bill Hickok whisper “Thank ya”

cube with legs starts acting very strangely.
cube with legs says “If anyone could kill Sgt. Monkey for me, I'd be rather chuffed. Thanks from Otyr.”
cube with legs says “Sorry for posessing you, mate.”
cube with legs returns to normal after a spell of acting strangely.
cube with legs jumps up in such a steep arc it almost knocks down one of the chandeliers. The steel body slumps to the floor, probably the first time it landed not on the nimble feet.
cube with legs fiddles the limbs in the air helplessly, as if looking to grab for something firm. The cube somehow manages to recompse itself and get back on the shaking legs.
cube with legs darts through the nearby window outside.

Katie Calhoun looks out the window after Cube

Uther says “Rather peculiar that cube. Is it me or does he want to buy my rifle?”
Uther says “or should I say it?”
Uther says “Not sure if cube has a gender, or is intended to imitate one.”
Uther ponders the matter for a bit, but to no avail.

Katie Calhoun says “Cube is wanting to know how rifles work which means explaining bullets.”
Katie Calhoun says “He has tried to get Seethers to tell him so maybe he is willing to pay someone to tell him. That means I will have holes in the walls.”

Shanks McBitey says “Hola! ¿Cómo estás?”

Katie Calhoun hands a small bag of coins to Shanks "Hi Shanks...long time no see. Thanks for the delivery"
.
Katie Calhoun scratchs out what was carved there before.
Katie Calhoun carves Rum/Beer 1gc-Wine 5gc & Juices/Water"
Katie Calhoun says “Thanks Shanks McBitey. We now have a few bottle of rum. Let me know if anyone wants any.”

Broomhead says “Hello all”

Katie Calhoun looks up from wiping the table and sees Broomhead walk through the door "Welcome to the Hanged Misfit."
Katie Calhoun says “You can see what we offer if you read the sign on the wall otherwise just grab and chair and just relax ”
Katie Calhoun yawns "I must be more tired then I thought.  I think I will go take a nap for awhile"
Katie Calhoun sits down her damp rag and heads toward the back room to her sleeping quarters. "Night all"

cube with legs clings on the windowsill with the front legs and slow pulls itself up. It takes a careful prolonged look at the inside of the bar.
cube with legs reluctantly extends one limb after another until the whole body sneaks inside and lands on the nearby table. Steel legs touch the polished surface without a slightest sound.
cube with legs creeps into the furthest corner carefully observing some new faces and swinging from side to side warily. It slumps down just behind the wooden barrel, partly visible.
cube with legs buzzes quietly as if whispering something.

Uther says “So there is rum now? Well then hit me ASAP Katie. 'Bout time we get a wider variety, and it's so affordable!”
Uther bounces a coin off the wall, landing into Katie's sleeping quarters.
Uther says “And you, shape of perfect symmetry, allow me to explain how rifles work.”

Katie Calhoun yells ouch from the back room

Uther says “Guess my aim is a bit off. My apologies Katie.”

Katie Calhoun coming walking out from the back room yawning "That hurt." She picks up a bottle of rum and sits it in front of Uther and yawns again. "There you go."
Katie Calhoun says “Oh look..Cube made it back.”

Uther says “Maybe I should try using the milk chocolate coins when I throw them....”
Uther says “Yes he is, rather subtle that cube. I've taken the time to explain rifles to him as well.”
Uther says “And Shanks, long time no see. How are good sir.”

Katie Calhoun looks at Cube then Uther "As long as he doesn't experiment with it in the bar and put holes in anything or people. He is a sweetie though"

Katie Calhoun takes a bottle of wine over to Shanks and sits it on the table "This is for you Shanks for all that you have helped me with. Also if you come by any more rum just let me know"

Uther says “I think that rum is getting to me. Must be some strong stuff.”

Shanks McBitey says “Much obliged for the wine Miss Katie.”

Uther says “Time I check Derby before my walking become simpaired, heh.”

Katie Calhoun watches Uther walk out the door

Uther says “Seems we have yet another strange guest in our town.”
Uther says “GiantDeathRobot

[Katie Calhoun]

The next day

Uther leans back in a chair and begins snoozing.

cube with legs creeps from behind the barrel and points to Uther's rifle once more. Then crawls back.
cube with legs mutters in the shadow "Anyyyone. Raather. Cube. Could. Mate. Anyone. Anyone. Thanks."
cube with legs clicks and buzzes a bit.

Katie Calhoun eyes get a little big on hearing what Cube said "Cube could mate anyone?"

cube with legs says “anyone could... be chuffed.. from Otyr. For posessing you. Mate. Could kill Sgt. Monkey... Sorry for posessing.”
cube with legs says “ Thanks from Otyr... from Otyr. Sgt. Monkey for me... anyone could kill.”

Katie Calhoun says “Ah..I get it now. Otyr was killed like Wild Bill was and his spirit came out of his body like you saw Wild Bills. But Otyr's spirit went into Cube and made your body talk so he could give us a message”
Katie Calhoun says “Spirits really should not do that but he wanted to let us know who killed him so I hope it didn't scare you too much. ”
Katie Calhoun says “If you hear a spirit wail and is hurting you just swing a Jack O'Lantern around like this and it should make them go away if they are still here.”
Katie Calhoun swing the ghastly jack o'lantern around.
Katie Calhoun gives a ghastly jack o'lantern to cube with legs .
Katie Calhoun swing the ghastly jack o'lantern around and then hands it to Cube. "Swing it around like that. Keep this one in case you need it"

Katie Calhoun says “An allosaurus who is a cannibal is still killing around Derby. If anyone sees him can you kill him or report his location?”
Katie Calhoun says “He was last seen killing coke bugs in the swamp.”


Cold Seether lashes a Jolly Jack O'Lantern to Cube With Legs. "Halloween decorations..."
Cold Seether then lashes on a loaded rifle to Cube With Legs attacks to an elaborate pully system. "Halloween Decoration Defense Systems, doncha know?"
Cold Seether says “Er... let's try that again...”
Cold Seether lashes a loaded rifle and an alaborate pulley system to Cube With Legs. "Halloween Decoration Defense System, doncha know?"

Katie Calhoun grins "Cold..what the hell are you doing."

Cold Seether says “Someboady might try to steal his pumpkin. Rough times we're living in.”
Cold Seether says “He does well with the rifle and the pumpkin, he might end up with a heavy sword...”
Cold Seether says “... though that might result in him leaning to one side... hmm..”

Katie Calhoun says “If you haven't noticed the little guy can form his legs into a machete so I don't think he will have a problem turning it into a heavy sword. He has been asking how a rifle works though. ”
Katie Calhoun says “Doesn't know about bullets yet.”

Paddy MacManus says “Cold's handing out broad swords? What about me?”


cube with legs takes the pumpkins with two middle limbs and grabs the rifle in the firm grip of the two front ones. It barely balances itself on only two legs but is quick to put the goods on the floor.
cube with legs says “tom tom tom...”
cube with legs pulls out some gold coins and a machete. A shiny thing goes to Katie,

Seether receives the same, only with the machete added. It looks like the same blade Katie gifted the cube earlier.

cube with legs gives you 1 gold coin.
cube with legs keeps mumbling while it finishes delivering the things and rushes back to the pile of newly found things. "tom tom..."
cube with legs picks the two pumpkins and waves them around a bit. Then takes a thorough look and puts both in its internal trunk. The steel wall clanks back and cube raises two legs above the two rifles.
cube with legs swings a ghastly jack o'lantern around.
cube with legs eyes both weapons, rolls them around a bit, pushes to one side, than another. All legs twitch and turn around. It looks very concentrated, if you could say that about a steel geometric shape...
cube with legs picks Seether's rifle and places it on the table. The barrel swings around from one patron to another in a menacing trajectory, the edge of rifle creaking against the smooth tabletop.
cube with legs pulls the trigger clumsily and the weapon spits the bullet with the trail of gunpowder smoke. It barely misses the head of Muad Dib piercing the soft wood in the wall behind him. Cube flinches.
cube with legs says “murmurs while crawling towards that tiny hole "cube cube cube..." It crawls under a few tables, then hops on another and makes a long jump towards the wall.”
cube with legs manages to make its way through without knocking down a single bottle or stepping on anybody's dusty shoes. It twists four legs into sharp pickax-like needles in the mid air.
cube with legs thrusts these into the wood and hangs itself just above the bullet hole. Cube then scratches it with the remaining limbs until the deformed piece of lead comes out. "Cube cube..."
cube with legs hops down and returns to the rifle carefully rolling the thing in one palm. It twists another spare limb into a machete and starts chopping both rifles into pieces.
cube with legs keeps hitting the metal parts despite their unwillingness to split open, retracts machetes back into legs to sharpen them up and continues again. Eventually, both barrels pop apart.
cube with legs picks the virgin bullet from Seether's rifle and starts comparing it with the creature that was just stuck in the wall.
cube with legs says “Anyone.”
cube with legs squeezes the shiny bullet a bit too tight and that proves enough for a sleeping powder to fire out a round. Part of its front limb is tore apart by the springing bullet and flies behind the bar.
cube with legs jumps watching its own leg propelling like a hasty comet with a tail of blood. It looks down at the pool of red liquid that is pouring out of its disfigured limb.
cube with legs extends a healthy leg to sip some of its own liquid. Then tilts up and crawls back behind the barrel. It moves the leg in lazy circles examining the remaining half of it.
cube with legs makes some vague high-pitched sound inside, barely heard across the bar.

Katie Calhoun woke up with a start after hearing a loud bang from the bar but thought it was just in her dreams when she heard another so came out from the back room to see what was going on.
Katie Calhoun looks around the room and see everyone asleep but notices Cube is not in his usual spot but then notices red liquid on the floor and what looks like part of Cube's leg.”
Katie Calhoun whispers "Cube? Are you ok?"
Katie Calhoun looks under all the tables and behind chairs until she hears a soft noise coming from behind the barrel so goes to investigate.
Katie Calhoun leans over and looks behind the barrel and sees Cube looking at his broken off leg and starts to panic. "Cube!"
Katie Calhoun gets a hold of herself and again notices the end of Cube's leg missing so gets on her hands and knees to start looking for it.”
Katie Calhoun eventually finds it behind the bar so picks it up and her box of tools including a couple of med kits.
Katie Calhoun pats Cube on the 'head'. "Don't worry Cube. I put EVA together so I do have an idea how your leg might be put back on.
Katie Calhoun takes out a few of her more precision tools and starts to work. After a while with a look a relief the leg is back on.
Katie Calhoun says “Just in case I will med kit you too to stop the bleeding.”

cube with legs crawls outside through the window
cube with legs  hops inside through a window and crawls to the usual corner spot behind the barrel. There is a scrap of Federation flag wrapped around its rear leg.
cube with legs says “*buzz* *click click click...*”

Paddy MacManus says while pointing at the cube, "Well there's the little cube man."

E.V.A. smiles over at cube and then plays a lively little tune. She makes motions every once in a while for him to come and join her.

cube with legs peeks at playing EVA from behind the dusty barrel. It crawls out buzzing something silently and travels across the bar.
cube with legs stops by Katie behind the bar and pulls out a bottle of some orange juice, mixed with a broken of branches and pieces of leaves. Probably a handwork of its own. Cube gives the bottle to Katie.
cube with legs continues crawling and hops on an empty table in the midway.
cube with legs says “If anyone could kill Sgt. Monkey for me, I'd be rather chuffed. Thanks from Otyr.”
cube with legs says “Sorry for possessing you, mate.”
cube with legs bounces down and up again landing on a free stool by the piano. It tilts itself towards mechanic hands of EVA that slide across white keys back and forth.

Katie Calhoun looks over at Cube "Thanks for the 'juice' Cube. That was sweet of you to make for me"
Katie Calhoun goes over to the stack of boxes to start restocking the shelves for the day.

[Katie Calhoun]

The next day

Wild Bill Hickok  says “{places pot in corner of room and proceeds to spit tobacco into said pot} I met Ryosuke yesterday he just darn ungentemanly amma pay him a visit in due course”
Wild Bill Hickok says “Seems he putting out grafetti bout him being a proud pker”
Wild Bill Hickok  says “{turns to the irishman looks him up and down with disdain}
Paddy yall asked me a question bout why I care...well lemme tell ya if imma not killing aint nobody gonna get away with it under ma nose”


Katie Calhoun says “You're right Wild Bill. If he is bragging about being a PK'er then he deserves what he gets.”

Brenner would slip in, nary a soul noticing him until the crisp sound of his gold hitting the table alerted everyone that this phantom had just ordered a drink.
Brenner 's bar stool wouldn't even squeak as he settled into it more comfortably. "Tasty Berry Schnapps, if you would be so kind."
Brenner gives you 5 gold coins.
Brenner casts a glance over his shoulder to the gathering of Derbites, Yorkers, and natives. A slight sneer would peek through as he regarded Uther, but he remained silent.
Brenner returned his attention back to the buxom barkeep, watching her as she went about her work. "A pleasure to finally meet you, Ms. Calhoun. The tidings must be well to see you so busy."
Brenner says “Seeing as I am a free and clear man in Derby, I figured I'd pop in and give you a visit. York certainly doesn't have this place's charm. Nor does any jungle knothole from here to Rakmo Isle.

Billfred says “Wild Bill Hickock? The, Wild Bill Hickock?”
Billfred says “I met a man named Wyatt Earp over in Durham, ever heard of him?”
Billfred says “Well, I'm off to find some elephants!”
Billfred salutes Katie
Billfred says “ma'am”

brume kills Brenner

The ghostly voice of Brenner says “Killed by a level 1 fellow made today? Goodness, talk about some hidden person with an agenda.”
The spectral figure of Brenner is hardly phased, his ethreal form shimmying forth from his body to rest at the bar once more. "Save the drink for when I'm around. Seems I'll be guzzling emotions for a spell."
The ghostly voice of Brenner says “Think pretty thoughts for me, won't you Katie?" The specter spared a roguish grin her way. "But in all seriousness, I think I'll relax with my flirting now, what with my flesh gone for now.”

Uther says “Good job pigbat on your sentence of Anthor."

cube with legs grabs a nearby chair and throws it at Uther. Then turns back to listen to the piano tunes played by EVA.

Uther says “Chairs are for sitting, in case you weren't aware.”
Uther laughs at cube's antics.

cube with legs throws another.

The spectral figure of Brenner nods reservedly to Uther. "Good job there, Constable. If I stick around, you might impress me."

Katie Calhoun says “I go take a nap and the place goes ape:palm:. ”
Katie Calhoun picks up the the gold coins from the table and makes a note that Brenner paid for a bottle of Tasty Berry Schnapps
Katie Calhoun looks at the spirit sitting in the corner and nods.
Katie Calhoun picks up the damp cloth and starts wiping down the tables for the day

Muad Dib says “I second the Cube. Also, I think Ryosuke is a nice guy, I met him yesterday and he gave me 10 gold coins.”

Katie Calhoun looks at Muad Dib and sees he is awake. "That was nice of him"
Katie Calhoun looks around and notices to many have fallen asleep. She ponders a bit on what should she do and then grins.
Katie Calhoun gets her singing voice ready
Katie Calhoun says “ When I get older losing my hair many years from now,”
Katie Calhoun says “Will you still be sending me a valentine...Birthday greetings..bottle of wine?”
Katie Calhoun says “If I'd been out till quarter to three Would you lock the door,”
Katie Calhoun says “Will you still need me, will you still feed me,...When I'm sixty-four?”

E.V.A. looks a little startled when Katie starts singing. The expression quickly disappears as she tries to fill the cricket filled silence with some blues on the piano.

Pigbat says “Hmm... does the robot know any Steely Dan?”

Katie Calhoun says “I love Black Cow by them but it always reminds me of the moving pictures "FM"”
Katie Calhoun tries to remember what goes in a Black Cow
Katie Calhoun thinks she's been on the island too long and wants to figure out how to make Kahlua since it's her favorite but wonders what to replace the milk with. "See...we need coconuts"

Muad Dib says “I gave my 17 FAKs to Paddy... who wants a crab?”

Katie Calhoun says “Thanks Muad Dib. You could save the crab to give to someone so that you can see them.”

Muad Dib says “Hurrrr durrr derp derp derp!”
Muad Dib says “Oww right, I laughed hard! I think I'm getting more crabs...”

Katie Calhoun laughs out loud

cube with legs buzzes and tries to stay still while Katie sings.

Katie Calhoun watches Muab Dib leave again and wonders if she should give him some downers since he can't seem to stay long in one place.

[Katie Calhoun]

Time went on

Dances with Kevin Costner kills Uther with a blowpipe.
Dances with Kevin Costner says “For Ackhor For Wiksik!” with a slight accent.

cube with legs tiptoes towards the body of Uther. It pokes the corpse a few times and drags one limb across drying blood.
cube with legs grabs Uther's head with front legs and drags the body through the open bar door. It lets the head slump to the dirt right next to the doorstep.
cube with legs murmurs and forms a razor with a brisk flip "cub cub"
cube with legs slides the blade across the chest and splits it open with a pair of other limbs. The remaining leg twitches into several shapes and dives in the intestines of Uther.
cube with legs keeps exploring the gory insides ocassionaly pulling out a piece of bloody tissue.
cube with legs says “*clank clank*”
cube with legs notices some bar patrons staring at it. It hugs the head of Uther and drags the body behind the wall leaving a pile of gore and blood behind. Twitching sound can be heard again.
cube with legs moves the machete-shaped leg up and down in an odd rhythm, blade dripping with blood swings just outside the window. After several minutes it falls silent.
cube with legs crawls back into the bar looking as if Uther has just exploded all over it. It sneaks into the corner to play with a few cleaned bones. "War. Pennn~ Pen. Penisulla."


Billfred says “EVA, I'm afraid the elephant hunt is on, I shall announce it shortly. Good day.”

Wild Bill Hickok says

[Katie Calhoun]

Muad Dib says “Jesus.... what the hell? I got caught in a nightmare, I couldn't wake up”
Katie Calhoun pats Muad Dib on the back "There...there. At least you're awake now"

Katie Calhoun snaps her fingers in front of Muad Dib's face "Muad Dib. Muad Dib? MUAD DIB! Wake the hell up!"

Muad Dib says “Oh... wow, sorry, I guess it won't happen again!”
Muad Dib says “So, what happened since I got asleep?”

Katie Calhoun says “Oh...nothing much. The sun still sets in the east.”
Katie Calhoun starts chuckling to herslef as she goes about wiping off the table tops.

Muad Dib looks out from a window... "Are you suuure?"

Katie Calhoun goes and looks out the window too " Crap. I've a feeling we're not in Shartak any more."
Katie Calhoun laughs again and goes back to wipping down the table tops.

Muad Dib says “The consequences... will never be the same...”
Muad Dib sits in a chair in a shadowy spot, pale, his hands shaking...

Katie Calhoun sits a bottle of wine in front of Muad Dib. "This should help the shaking."
Katie Calhoun gives a bottle of berry wine to Muad Dib .

Muad Dib gives you a bottle of tasty berry juice.
Muad Dib says “The shaking... is... gone! ...the sun is still weird, though”

Peasblossom kills Uther with a heavy sword.
Peasblossom squats down and places a red hibiscus in the middle of the dead man's chest. "Rest in peace warmongerig monster of Derby."
Peasblossom wipes her blade clean on his pant leg before heading to the door, mumbling to herself. "Now time to get my money."

Katie Calhoun “oh dear...a flower just killed Uther.”

Britney Spears says “saves on the florest bill.”

Muad Dib says “I lol'd”

Brenner mops his cutlass clean, a contract clean. "Bounty Hunting was never this easy before..."

Erich Zann shrugs and shakes his head. "I thought they called off the war. Well it's quite a pity that things have to get so out of control."

cube with legs finishes the jumpy tune with the gentle help of the bar doll. It hops down and makes a few laps around the bot. "Cube. Tune. tuuune."
cube with legs tilts upwards and extends one leg towards the shiny key at the back of the doll *buzzz*. It takes hold of the copper thing and twists it from side to side making the gears creek.
cube with legs slides between the maid's legs taking a brief peek under her skirt. It crawls in front of her measures the shell of the maid with a pair of limbs.

Muad Dib says “I say, let him have his war, don't get us all in the middle.”

cube with legs points at her "EVA. Beer." Turns to Billfred "Elephant. Beer elephant."

Muad Dib says “We'll get just a couple of natives per day paying a visit and killing Uther in their way”
Muad Dib says “If we don't get in the war, the war won't get in us.”
Muad Dib says “kthxbye, I'm sleepy”

Katie Calhoun looks at the Cube looking up EVA skirt and frowns.
Katie Calhoun says “I wonder how many more times Uther is going to be killed over this.”

Deus257 says “Bad Cube, Gentlemen or in your case Gentle...Creature? do not look up womens skirts...even if theu are mechanical”
Deus257 says “I wonder how many time pershing and baron have been killed”

Katie Calhoun says “Black Jack is hibernating some where and is not even around. The Baron almost got killed but I hear someone got in the way.”

Baron Robert Surcouf says “Lets not be watching my back too often Brenner, you're expensive!”
Baron Robert Surcouf bows to Ms. Spears
Baron Robert Surcouf says “We shall depart for safari on the morrow my dearest. Please ensure that we have enough umbrellas, and we'll need rugs for the tent. I must return to speak with Monsieur Tathers. Adieu.”

Katie Calhoun says “I wonder if the Baron just realized what he had just done.”
Katie Calhoun sees a monkey climb through the window with a piece of paper in his hand.
Katie Calhoun hands the monkey a banana in exchange for the piece of paper. "I was wondering when you would show up. Thank you"
Katie Calhoun then watches the monkey climb back out the window and was gone.
Katie Calhoun starts reading the paper and chuckles.
Katie Calhoun says “Looks like the scientists did my little experiment for me. I noticed beer did funny things to you men. Listen to this.”
Katie Calhoun says “Dear Katie, You were right. Your theory that beer may contain small traces of female hormones was correct. To prove your theory, we fed 100 men twelve bottles of beer each.”
Katie Calhoun says “We then observed that 100% of the male test group gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became emotional, and couldn't drive a cart.”
Katie Calhoun says “ No further testing is planned. Congrats on your discovery Katie.”
Katie Calhoun folds the piece of paper and shoves it down her cleavage for safe keeping then begins wiping down the counter with a damp cloth .

[Katie Calhoun]

10/22
Billfred says “I'm afraid I must be going in a while, your hospitatlity has been splendid. If I'd have known it was so good, I'd have brought the Island Tavern award from York with me.”
 Billfred says “It sits in the Museum doing bugger all to be honest, no one would miss it!”

 Deus257 Shake's his head as baron leaves, "Must be nice to go on Safari while the Village is under attack"

 Cold Seether says “STOP WHISPERING IN MY EAR! I ain't joining your gawdurned army!”
 Cold Seether says “And to Hell with you people questioning my loyalty to Derby! I was loyal to Derby BEFORE there was an Eastern Federation to reprise five times over!”
Cold Seether notices nobody saw anyone anywhere near him immediately before his outburst
Cold Seether says “Aww, crap. You're all gonna think I'n nuts, then Rubik over there is going to start buzzing and mimicking me... I knew I

Katie Calhoun looks at the piano "A Island Tavern award would look great sitting next to the Wild Bill's skull candle holder on top of the piano."
Katie Calhoun looks at Billfred "Otyr took his head for me several times. I am still holding one of Wild Bill's skulls."

Wild Bill Hickok says “enjoy them beers on me”
Wild Bill Hickok says “If anyone is asking for seeds may I ask that you pass that message on?”

Katie Calhoun says “Can you get me some poison berry seeds?”

Wild Bill Hickok says “mam I can provide those, my stock is low at the moment but imma bring you some back ”
Wild Bill Hickok says “lemme think about costs...mebbe I should just set some prices ”

Katie Calhoun says “I am in no hurry for the poison berries so anytime would be fine. I want to make some bottle of poison berry wine.”
Katie Calhoun squats down and looks at Uther on the floor "How long are you going to keep sleeping on the job?"
Katie Calhoun stands back up so she can grab one of Uther's legs to pull him over to the wall and then covers him with a blanket.

Paddy MacManus looks at Katie as he wakes up to see a dead Uther next to him. He sees the paper sticking from her cleavage and smoothly and quickly takes it from her and reads it. "Well what's this now?"
Paddy MacManus finishes reading the paper and says, "Well it is a good thing I stock to Rum." as he hands it back to Katie.

Katie Calhoun continues to look at Uther "You touch me there again and you might lose your fighting hand." but then grins and looks at Paddy.
Katie Calhoun walks back to the bar to clean the glasses before Paddy tries anything else.

Paddy MacManus says “Couldn't help myself." With a wink, he adds "Can you blame me?”

Katie Calhoun chuckles "Well...you got me there. I wouldn't blame myself either." then looks at her own hand and blushes.

Uther sighs.
Uther says “Anthor just won't let this go....very well.”
Uther says “Peasblossom, along with the KOW and other assassins sent by Anthor, are hereby banished from Derby, with the exception of Otyr, whom has served the PF well in the past.”

Katie Calhoun says “You're back.”

Uther says “Yes, the KOW's banishment still stands. Anthor has proved himself too immature for anything less.”
Uther says “Yes, I'm back, and quite tired of Anthor.”

Paddy MacManus watches Katie hand with slight excitement, hoping for the best.

Katie Calhoun says “How do you know they were all from Anthor?”

Uther says “All PF members whom are in the room, keep this in mind. All KOW members, as well as Dances With Kevin Costner, and Peasblossom, are fair game in Derby.”

Katie Calhoun frowns at Paddy then winks

Uther says “Anthor is the only one that paid mercs to kill me.”
Uther says “He's also the only one with reason to.”

Katie Calhoun says “Did you just declare war on the KOW?”

Uther says “Hold on a moment, RL errand, back in a matter of minutes.”
Uther says “No, I outright banned them from setting foot in Derby.”

Katie Calhoun says “((OOC)) Dammit Uther...keep to the rp or don't say anything”

Paddy MacManus says “Don't frown at me. I am only a man.”

Uther says “Anyways, Anthor said he'd not go to war with the PF, yet he kept his assassins coming for Pershing, Baron and myself.”
Uther says “That is unacceptable, and those are the consequences.”

Katie Calhoun says “Are you saying he is still sending them? Maybe you should ask him.”

Uther says “Yes Anthor is still sending him. Anymore and I'll be sending a few his way through my own wallet.”

Wild Bill Hickok says “the only way to shut these indians up is with sum lead. Yall can lead an action against em without it being war”
Wild Bill Hickok says “A daring one off rout or hiring the local hermits to harass em for a few days ”
Wild Bill Hickok says “(spits into his carefully placed tobacco pot) what do i know huh? Billfred you seen my boy earp?”

Uther says “Anthor doesn't claim responsibility, but he is the only one with reason to send mercs against me. I don't have the authority to declare war, as much as I'd love to shoot him dead.”
Uther says “I doubt he's telling the truth though.”
Uther says “Those so-called "indians, you're referring to, lost miserably at Midway, at the hands of less than 10 Derbian soldiers.”
Uther says “They know they can't take on the PF, hence why they've been hiding behind hired guns.”

Muad Dib says “I am overwhelmed...”

[snico]

Katie, snico is going to totally visit your bar, without killing anyone as long as she kills the one she means to kill... like before he enters your bar, okay?

[Katie Calhoun]

Billfred says “Can anyone get hold of Mill?”

Peasblossom kills Uther with a heavy sword.

Billfred says “wonderful. I walk in on the assassination of Uther.”

Peasblossom says “Apparently your anger cannot be assuaged. And your hunger will never be appeased. .” with a slight accent.
Peasblossom says “Like Tantalus reaching for the far away peach, your thirst will drive you to madness as the waters recede beneath your feet.” with a slight accent.

Billfred shakes a dice cup and spills them onto the floor. They show a five and a five.
Billfred says “Wonderful!”

Katie Calhoun yawns walking in from the back room after a good nights sleep and sees Uther's dead on the floor again "Déjà vu"

Paddy MacManus walks into the bar to see the beautiful face of Katie but frowns at the some what consistent sight of a dead Uther. "Got him again, did they?"

Katie Calhoun looks down at Uther "Don't worry Uther...you're not dead...you're resting."
Katie Calhoun says “ Since you're just resting people won't say 'He's passed on! He's no more! He has ceased to be!' Or 'He's expired and gone to meet his maker! He's a stiff! Bereft of life, He rests in peace!'”
Katie Calhoun takes his leg once again and pulls him over to the side wall to cover him with a blanket.
Katie Calhoun hears someone saying..'.He's off the twig! He's kicked the bucket, He's shuffled off his mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisible!! THIS IS AN EX-UTHER!'
Katie Calhoun looks down at Uther "Just ignore them."
Katie Calhoun looks at the blanket she covered Uther in and wondered if she should have used the Norwegian Blue one.

Mill Wilkinson says “Seems like Derby is alive and well, as it should be”
Mill Wilkinson says “Although I do hate people killing other people while in a tavern, shows bad taste when there's no legal authority to back it up.”

Katie Calhoun says “Most times we do kill them.”
Katie Calhoun says “Uther seems to have brought this on himself so we're staying out of it and hopes he comes to his senses soon.”

Twist saunters into the bar, whistling tunelessly to himself. He pauses to look around interestedly, before taking a seat at a nearby table and gesturing for a beer.
Twist waves cheerfully at no-one in particular. "Wotcha, gang. Go Bov's!"

Katie Calhoun picks up a beer to take to Twist "There you go. That' will be 1gc. Glad to see another new face around here"

Twist smiles in thanks, and tosses Katie a coin. He winks. "And another one for having such a pretty smile."

Katie Calhoun grins and goes to get another beer.
Katie Calhoun comes back and sits the bottle of beer on the table for Twist and then looks over at Cube. "I wonder if Cube is still assimilating all the info he got from dissecting Uther."
Katie Calhoun picks up the coins from the table and puts them in her pocket then looks at Twist "If you want another just let EVA or I know"
Katie Calhoun walks to the bar door and says "I will be right back"
Katie Calhoun walks back in the bar muttering to herself while carrying a grate of beer and sits it over behind the bar until EVA can start putting them on the shelf.
Katie Calhoun says “The local store should make sure they keep their stock up or don't even bother to be open if they are going to run out of beer.”

Twist looks at the second bottle sat on the table in front of him, then looks over at Katie. "I was rather hoping for someone to share it with..."

Katie Calhoun grins "I know"
Katie Calhoun notices Uther's body was gone again so picks up the blanket for the next time it is needed.
Katie Calhoun says “I wonder how long he will live the next time Uther walks through that door? Anyone got a guess?”

Paddy MacManus says “Less than 24 hours.”

Katie Calhoun looked confused all of a sudden since she didn't make much sense even to herself but think "Oh what the hell. Who cares" and goes on about her business
Katie Calhoun looks at Paddy and laughs..."I say 4 hours"
Katie Calhoun says “Anyone else care to see how close they get? The closest guess gets a free bottle of wine but you can't be the one that kills him.”

Paddy MacManus says “Probably”
Paddy MacManus says “Wait...can't kill him? Damn!”

Muad Dib says “Say, he'll come here first to whine about the murder, so...”
Muad Dib says “About 12 hours, I hope...”
Muad Dib says “... I meant "guess".”
Muad Dib says “I'll go get some bottles...”
Muad Dib comes in dragging a crate half full of berry juice.

Katie Calhoun takes the bottles of berry juice to the back room for her wine making monkey to get started on. "Wow...thanks for the berry juice Muad Dib."
Katie Calhoun takes out her piece of paper and writes down Muad Dib 12 hours.
Katie Calhoun looks at her list again and chuckles "Paddy, you have to pick how many hours not say 'Less than 24 hours.'”

Paddy MacManus says “Well I'll put in a real guess of eight hours”

Katie Calhoun says “Got it”
Katie Calhoun looks around "If anyone wants to try their luck just let me know after you burp from your beer"

Muad Dib says “I'm not done with the juice, I'm just about to fall asleep...”

Katie Calhoun says “Take that much needed nap Muad Dib. You've earned it”

E.V.A. starts stocking beers in the back room. She soon returns and heads back to her familiar place at the piano and plays a blues number for Katie.
E.V.A. looks up quickly from the piano. "Alert sounding: Derby citizen being killed at -70.242,+26.360. Permission to assist in his defense."

Katie Calhoun says “Go get him EVA”
Katie Calhoun says “Oh oh..those coordinates are to far away.”

Deus257 says “I wonder who was being killed”

Katie Calhoun says “Remember Erich Zann that came and played the violin with EVA? That was him but he is just too far away.”
Katie Calhoun says “Also Uther's body is not at the town shaman's.”

cube with legs buzzes and crawls out after EVA.

Muad Dib says “The countdown started, everyone, place your bets... can I go down from 12 to 3?”

Katie Calhoun says “After being killed so many times I am not sure he will be back until he is fully rested. Why he didn't stay down until then I don't know.”
Katie Calhoun watches Cube crawl out the door and hopes he doesn't get himself in trouble.

snico attacks you with a wooden club for 3 damage.

Katie Calhoun hear snico whisper “...” with a slight accent.
Katie Calhoun hear snico whisper “Sorry” with a slight accent.

snico says “Since my original pokan can't go tamrakuckh, tamme to make some money.” with a slight accent.
snico kills Twist with a wooden club.
snico takes a look at the dead man's face, and laughs. "My, what a clean face for a Yorkie. Wonder who wants you dead."
snico shakes her head. "Shame to ruin such a nice face, but, my contract dictates I eat you. You know how it is."
snico takes a bite out of Twist, and looks at Brenner's direction. "What, you don't do this?"
snico carves pieces off the body of Twist and begins eating!

Katie Calhoun says “You know...I should kill you snico”

snico walks to the bar. "No use running, haha. Sorry about killing in your pretty little bar, but I need to make money before I can buy a drink! Toss me one, will you?"
snico says “Well, feel free, it happens all the time.” with a slight accent.

Muad Dib says “Here I can see snico!”

Katie Calhoun says “If I had the energy I think I would kill you right now”

snico bows to the crowd. "It is I, the great snico! I did not know I had so many admirers!"
snico says “If you let me stay, I'll take care of what I came her to do.."” with a slight accent.
snico winks at Brenner, then takes one last bite out of Twist.
snico carves pieces off the body of Twist and begins eating!

Katie Calhoun says “Muad Dib says you asked for a beer. One beer coming up.”
Katie Calhoun give a bottle of beer to snico .
Katie Calhoun says “That will be 1 gc”
Katie Calhoun says “If I let you stay you can not kill anyone else but Uther which is who I think you are here for.”

Muad Dib says “Seconded”
Muad Dib says “Good night, ladies and gentlemen... and cannibal”

Cold Seether says “Hmm... somebody done went and killeds'em an Uther before I could beat some respect into the little turd.”

Muad Dib slumps on the floor asleep.

Brenner unsheathes his sword and approaches the mercenary-cannibal. "C'mere, little girl, I've got a present for you..."
*Brenner attack snico many times*

Katie Calhoun attack snico with a heavy sword for 1 damage. They drop to 81 HP.
Katie Calhoun attack snico with a heavy sword for 5 damage. They die. You gain 45 XP.
Katie Calhoun says “Sorry snico but you know my rules.....no killing in the bar”

Brenner slumps back into his seat. "Assistance in partial justice for me. I'll take it into consideration as being even, Snico."
 
Katie Calhoun says “But you did hit me first once even though you said sorry.”
Katie Calhoun says “The beer I gave you is on the house snico. Come back again but next time no killing.”
Katie Calhoun wipes off her sword and puts it back behind the counter and tosses the bloody rag in the garbage.

[Iceman]

My hero!

[Katie Calhoun]

The ghostly voice of snico says “Hmm... seems anockhokr bounty is in here too... I'll have to come back ” with a slight accent.

Deus257 says “I wonder if there will be Zombies this year?”

Katie Calhoun says “I heard there were”
Katie Calhoun looks at the spirit sitting in the corner and nods "I have never killed a zombie so this should be fun"

The spectral figure of Twist assumes spirit form in a blaze of pink-and-purple light. He coalesces into a form reminiscent of his corporeal one, only even more achingly boner-inducingly handsome. Plus, it's got a face.
The spectral figure of Twist straightens his ethereal scarf, and huffs. His misty face is set in an expression of extreme disgruntlement. "Well, that was incredibly rude."
The ghostly voice of Twist says “And extremely crass. Killing someone for money? What sort of ill-educated, boorish oaf would make a living doing such a thing? They'd have to be at least half-retarded. And probably fat and ugly, too.”

Katie Calhoun snickers

The spectral figure of Twist sighs. The pipes lining the walls emit an eery keening as a chill wind whispers through the room briefly. "Well, I guess I'd better be finding myself a body."
The spectral figure of Twist floats towards the door. He passes directly through Katie, and grins as she gasps and shivers momentarily. He pauses. "Hey, did that mean we just... you know... did it?"

Katie Calhoun laughs so hard she almost dropped the glass she was cleaning .
Katie Calhoun realizes she does feel a little less stressed and goes back the cleaning the glass in her hand.
The spectral figure of Twist nods his head. "We must have done, because that's what women always do afterwards."

Katie Calhoun looks around the bar and then back at Twist's spirit "Shhhh. Didn't you say you were going to get your body?"

The spectral figure of Twist winks roguishly. "Warm for my form, are we sweetheart?" He polishes his ghostly fingernails on an ethereal jacket-breast. "Yup, that's the effect I have on the ladies."
The spectral figure of Twist begins to pulse with a deep purple light, which is not in any way some kind of phallic symbolism.
The spectral figure of Twist begins to contract, the throbbing purple glow increasing in speed, and flashing through with streaks of pink.
The spectral figure of Twist shrinks further, the strobing aurora intensifying to a blinding glare. With a sudden flash that leaves the more psychically-attuned blinking, it disappears.

Twist strolls through the door. He takes his former, unwillingly-vacated seat, and picks up his half-finished beer.
Twist raises it to Katie. "To my knightess in shining armour!"

Billfred says “buggering bugger. right. I'm off to the hunt.”

Twist grins lasciviously. "And the lucky, lucky steed she rides. I live yet in hope..."
Twist watches the door swing shut behind Billfred. "For men, no doubt."

Katie Calhoun watches Billfred walk out door then looks at Twist "Good to see you back in body form." then frowns "I wonder where my doll is. She has work to do."
Katie Calhoun walks over to Brenner and glares down at his sleeping form. "I just got a message that said you killed my yeastweed supplier while he was on his way to the bar"
Katie Calhoun leans over and opens one of Brenner's eyes with her finger "He was also on his way to deliver my crates of beer and rum I had ordered too."
Katie Calhoun lets go of Brenner's eyelid where it promptly shut again. "Shanks McBitey is a regular here and will be coming back to the bar soon so please don't kill him ever again."
Katie Calhoun says "You may have killed him just right outside of town limits but I need my bar supplies as of yesterday"
Katie Calhoun crosses her arms over her ample chest and taps her foot for a bit and wonders if putting a sleeping man's hand in warm water really works as well as they say.


Deus257 says “Hm, Brenner you messed with the wrong Lady”
Deus257 says “if you want Katie I could..."Discipline" him,
Deus257 says “i think I killed a Russian Named Brenner during the Crimean War, did he try to scream when I pulled his tongue out through the hole I made in his neck”
Deus257 says “It was funny seeing him flail about as the blood spewed out almost like a fountain”
Deus257 says “boy those lifeless eyes...rolled into the back of his head...his comrades wetting themselves as I went after them next”
Deus257 says “If they had me in the Light Brigade it would have been a slaughter...for the Russians.”

Katie Calhoun grins "Naw...I am just teasing but still letting him know that Shanks works for the bar which he didn't know. He also belongs to THE MISFITS just like you and I do"

Deus257 says “I'm not allowed in russia...not since the war...”
Deus257 looks disappointed but then accepts this news, "Aw well maybe some other time then"

Katie Calhoun yawns and sits down in the closest chair then looks around at the 8 people left in the bar and wonders where everyone went today.
Katie Calhoun closes her eyes and within a few minutes you hear a soft sound coming from the sleeping beauty.

Deus257 takes a seat at a table and proceeds to clean his 4 rifles and polish his 3 cutlass's humming a tune

E.V.A. walks into the bar, steam slipping in large streams out of her ears. "I am sorry master, I was unable to assist and was away too long."

Deus257 continues cleaning his rifle, not looking up, "Can't win them all E.V.A."

Black Jack Pershing says “Evening all. ”

Katie Calhoun opened an eye and said "Sounds like Black Jack's back in town" then closes it again.

Deus257 stops cleaning his weapons and glares at Katie
Deus257 unsheathes his knife, gets up and slowly walks toward her
Deus257 he looks down on her with eyes that have seen the faces of many men killed by his hands
Deus257 he raises his knife in fashion as if readying to stab her in the neck

Katie Calhoun opens her eyes and looks at Deus."Need another drink yet?"

Deus257 brings it down swiftly yet silently
Deus257 raises it back up with a highly venomous spider on the end twitching
Deus257 he tosses the spider on the ground and crushes it under his boot

Katie Calhoun looks at the spider and then back at Deus "Thanks. I don't like spiders"

Deus257 sheaths his knife and walks back to his seat, "best watch where you sleep Calhoun, just because your in a hut doesn't mean the bugs can't get you"
Deus257 sits in his chair and continues cleaning his weapons
Deus257 looks at Katie and nods
Deus257 gets back to cleaning his rifle

Katie Calhoun shifts in her chair a bit to get comfortable "I guess you right. EVA...activate medium bug alert please.

E.V.A. snaps to attention. "Bug alert activated, master. Sounding alarm at any medium to large sized detected bugs."


Brenner would note Katie's words with a simple nod. Brenner didn't kill with malice. That time, anyway.
Brenner turns his icy gaze over to Deus, a sneer forming while he tut-tuts to the uppity Derbite. "If I were you, I'd stop trying to play up to being the barkeep's lapdog."
Brenner says “The more you yap, the more people start to wonder whether or not she neutered you.”
Brenner says “I kill in order to kill. Don't give me a good reason. Or, rather, do. Please, for the love of all your fragile little mind holds dear, give me a reason to paint these walls with your remains.”
Brenner says “I don't care what you did in some magical little campaign. Do something worthwhile with your miserable hide before you go making idle threats to people who would feed you to the gulls.”
Brenner 's cackle rings within the bar. "Go live out your war-flashbacks elsewhere. I don't give a flying shargle about your posturing. If you want to pester me about something that matters..."
Brenner says “Then I'll be pleasantly surprised.”
Brenner says “I'll leave Shanks alone, Katie. No hard feelings unless he comes after me again.”

Winston T. Monocle says “Brenner, Shanks never came after you in the first place. You came after him. It was due to Katie's intervention however that you are not dead right now.”
Winston T. Monocle says “When you kill people arbitrarily, expect to be killed in return.”
Winston T. Monocle says “And it's not Katie you should be apologizing to.”

Brenner glances to Winston. "That's awfully well informed of you, bub. But I'm not interested in justice that's not in my favor. And I'm not going to whine to anyone over it, either."
Brenner says “If he kills me after I've nodded to the little lady, I'll just have to show him how very, very much I'm sorry for the first one with a boot to the head. I won't be hunting him again.”


Brenner says “But to be clear, I am respecting the sanctity of this little bar with my fullest intent. Katie's a nice lady, and I'd rather not worry her over my corpses.”

Katie Calhoun walks back through the door carrying a bloody sword "That damn Sgt Monkey killed Muab Dib again out in the swamp where I had sent him to pick up a few things."
Katie Calhoun says “I found the Sgt in the water right next to the deep water where he is floating as I speak. I wish Uther would do his job since people have been asking for help against Sgt Monkey. ”
Katie Calhoun says “He's got to do more then just list his name on the death list and then ignore him.”
Katie Calhoun finishes wiping the blood off her sword and puts it back behind the counter .

Deus257 walks in and hold up a flyer that says, "Resist the Draft! Down with le grande armee!"
Deus257 says “Bunch of these been posted on huts across town”
Deus257 says “Got some beer and water if your interested Katie,”

Katie Calhoun looks at Deus "Sure I am interested. Can you hand them to Paddy so he can take them to the Oktoberfest? He will be going in my place to represent the Hanged Misfit there.

[Katie Calhoun]

Uther strolls into the pub casually, with a look of displeasure on his face.
Uther says “Seems much has been going on in my absence. I had something that required the utmost attention, for now I hope it does not interfere with my work.”
Uther turn toward Katie "Do report each instance of Sgt Monkey's evil deeds. You know I'll do well on hunting him down."
Uther says “Hopefully whomever cowers behind his hired maggots has had enough.”

Katie Calhoun says “Just to let you know I took care of Sgt Monkey today for killing Muab Dib today. He still has death sentences for killing Muab Dib before, Iljimae and Otyr since they had asked to find him.”


Brenner says “I killed Otyr once more as well." The bounty hunter would turn upon his stool to Uther with an expectant, somber look upon his face. "That'll be 20 gold.”
Brenner says “High-value targets who repeatedly attack PF members cost a decent amount.”

Katie Calhoun turns to look at Brenner and then stares at Uther remembering the kind things Uther use to say about Otyr.
Katie Calhoun shakes her head while she keeps mopping the floor hoping she can get more of the blood stains out since it's starting to make the floor look bad.

Uther laughs "When Otyr decides against killing Derbians, especially of his own accord, I'll gladly give the dog some praise.
Uther says “Iljimae hasn't set foot in Derby, so technically hasn't visited Derby, thus is not protected under PF law, but in the case of Muad Dib, how many sentences we talkin' on this Sgt Monkey fellow?”
Uther begins disassembling one of his rifles. "Damned thing needs a thorough cleaning."

Katie Calhoun frowns and looks at Uther "Iljimae has been in town many times and I just said how many kills that I know of that Sgt Monkey has done."

Uther says “Just one sentence for Monkey? Pity. I'd hoped to have a bit more fun hunting that disgraceful man.”
Uther says “Any sign of Keiichi? He hasn't killed Pike lately, but still has some sentences on him.”

Katie Calhoun stops mopping and lays her chin on the top of the mop handle "I thought the PF law covered all of PF territory not just Derby or am I wrong."

Uther says “PF territory being Midway, Port Breton, and the nearby islands.”

Katie Calhoun says “Not one sentence for Monkey but 3 like I said earlier. At least according to the law that was in your head last time.”


Uther says “Otyr had a sentence for murdering Pershing, so I'll take his death as having served that sentence, even though I'd rather shoot him myself.”
Uther says “Sgt Monkey after all is a citizen of Derby, even if he is a deplorable one.

Katie Calhoun lifts her chin off the mop handle since it seems she is starting to get a headache. "I think I will go take a short nap. Be back in a while."

Uther reassembles his rifle, eying it proudly. "Ready to execute them lowly criminals again!"
Uther recalls something important. "What's this I hear about anti Grand Army non sense about the town?"

Paddy MacManus leans forward, cocking an eyebrow in interest.

Deus257 says “Someones been carving it on huts around town”
Deus257 says “Trying to start an Anti-PF movement I suppose, or someone who just likes to vandalize”

Uther says “I think Billfred has knowledge of this. He'd told me he had clients that are planning Baron's permanent down fall.”
Uther says “He'd also issued me a warning that if I continue to support Baron, I would be taken down with him.”
Uther says “Although his clients, whoever they may be, want me to come out of that unscathed.”
Uther says “Being that he is a self-proclaimed propagandist, I haven't taken it seriously.”
Uther says “He has some explaining to do, but how to go about it? He won't willingly divulge what could be the most valuable information he has.”
Uther says “Likely he isn't directly responsible, but he definitely knows who is behind these anti PF carvings.”
Uther says “Anyone else have information that may be relevant to this matter?”
Uther says “Deus and MacManus, it would be wise to watch Billfred carefully, and note anything suspicious he might say.”
Uther says “Those of The Misfits, it would be appreciated if you divulged to me any information that you may come across, in relation to this matter.”
Uther says “Mill Wilkinson, being still of the first government of Derby, your help would appreciated as well, if you gain any knowledge pertaining to this.”


Brenner would quirk his brow at the pompous constable prone to delusional seizures. "I'm sorry, but you seem to have ignored my reasonable statement. You owe me 20 GC for doing your job."
Brenner says “I killed Otyr, who was responsible for 3 different violent acts against your officials. I expect my money. Your GP or your HP, donut-muncher. I'd rather work with you than have you as a job.”

Paddy MacManus says “Stay your hand Brenner.”

Katie Calhoun comes yawning from the back room "Did I hear you right? Are you saying Otyr killed 3 officials? Who were they?"
Katie Calhoun says “I only know of him killing one official and that is Black Jack once.”

Deus257 says “brenner as long as you are in the misfits you cannot make threats like that, especially to members of the PF”

Katie Calhoun looks around the room. "What's the matter with all you? Brenner just told us that Uther paid him to do his job since Uther couldn't and now wants his money."
Katie Calhoun rolls her eyes at everyone and starts stocking the shelves with the new supplies Shanks brought in earlier.

Brenner says “Otyr made two attempts on the Baron's life, one of which I thwarted personally. The other was the killing of Pershing. Baron paid me for my last rush-service.”
Brenner says “In killing Otyr, I probably just saved Uther's sorry hide. He's the only PF member worth his own weight in bogus to matter to that merc.”
Brenner says “Deus, I would gladly note that you should respond to things I say before you act like my Nanny. I'm of no interest to you unless it makes you look good. Stow it and save it for the soapbox.”

Katie Calhoun looks up and listens and nods to herself but keeps stocking the shelves.

Brenner says “Besides, I would think that Uther would enjoy any helping hand he could get. Or is it the case of an ugly wench surrounding herself with uglier wenches to make the one look better?”
Brenner says “Does Uther not anyone competent doing his job for him? Of course, I welcome him to impress me by actually policing in this town for a change...”

Paddy MacManus says “Well" as he heads for the door, "off to the Oktoberfest to rake in a lot of gold for the bar.”

Uther says “While I appreciate you killing Otyr, I did not hire you. If you seek payment for killing Otyr, who did have a sentence to serve, then see whoever it is that hired you, whether it be Baron or Pershing.”
Uther says “And as far as threatening a high ranking member of the PF such as myself, you could cause trouble for yourself, as well as Katie. I know Katie doesn't want any trouble,”
Uther says “and I don't want to bother with you.”
Uther says “You can't twist my arm for money. It just don't work that way around here.”
Uther says “And I do my job just fine. Derby has been all the better since I became Minister of Justice. Baron and Pershing can confirm that as well.”
Uther says “I hired no one to do my job, and I don't much appreciate such slander Brenner. I've never paid others to do my job.”

Katie Calhoun says “Don't forget Uther that Deus, EVA and I did most of your work and today I did your work again by killing Sgt Monkey who should have died long ago. As long as you don't go witch hunting again I am fine”

Uther says “Katie, Otyr made an attempt on Baron, but failed. He did manage to get Pershing once.”
Uther says “I rallied other PF members to take part in their duty, protecting their home. I did my fair share of work, and you 3 did quite a bit of work yourselves.”

Katie Calhoun says “I do know that but he is being charged for killing 3 officials which he did not kill. He might have tried twice with the Baron but did not suceed. He only killed Black Jack and served his sentence.”

Uther says “As far as Sgt Monkey, I was investigating something more important, but now I'm back and will slaughter the lot of these lowsy low lifes that threaten the peace of this town.”

Katie Calhoun says “I wish you luck and please don't go back to witch hunts again. The serial killers should be at the top of your list.”

Uther says “Feel free to teach your pal Brenner about this town. Threatening the local law man doesn't make a good impression on the ruling government of Derby.”

Katie Calhoun looks out the window "I wonder where Cube went off to. Hope he's not dissecting someone."

Uther says “While I'm on the subject Brenner, when did I supposedly hire you to do my job? I'd love to see you prove such an outrageous statement.”
Uther says “That cube's been absent for quite some time.”
Uther says “I'm going to scour the town right this minute and see what's going on 'round here.”

Deus257 finishes cleaning his last rifle, "If you want Katie I could go look for the little guy, see if he's ok"

Katie Calhoun says “That's ok. He'll be back”

Uther walks into the bar with a puzzled expression on his face.
Uther says “No sign of that cube. What could he be up to? Knowing him he's likely examining someones corpse, if not piecing it together.”

Katie Calhoun says “When I went to the traders a bit ago I asked around. It seems he's in the swamp dissecting alligators of all things.”

Uther says “Gators? Well, better them then us.”
Uther bursts out in a fit of laughter.
Uther says “Time I rest up for my patrol duties tomorrow.”
Uther slumps over the table, resting his bloodshot eyes.

E.V.A. plays a lullaby on the piano. When she finishes she moves towards the back room to stock the booze, trying to make as little noise as possible; her clicking almost the sound of a large clock.

Brenner scoffs at the constable bloated on sugary delights and his own, less savory pride. "I see no ranking official in you after all. I just see a sad, sad little man."
Brenner waves a hand to the patrons of the Misfit and it's staff. "The barkeep here and her happy drunks are a whole hell of a lot more effective than you ever were."
Brenner says “I'll just relish that thought for a spell and let you stagnate in your own impotence. Get off your happy arse and get some damn work done.”

E.V.A. clicks over to Brenner and leans down. "Shhhh you will wake him and then my auditory senses will be overloaded again. It becomes hard to move at times when that happens."

[FirstAmongstDaves]

[OOC I have done an image for the HM. I'll see if I can post it - or shall I email it to someone? Saves me having to save it to Facebook which is a pain and how I usually do it...]